Wheel of Convenience?

On Gareth Cliff's show, they have been running a competition called the "Wheel of Convenience" by Janssen Cilag for their contraceptive patch.

So you spin the wheel and win prizes that are supposed to make your life easier. Things like a butler for a day, a PA for a day or a chef for a night.

What i was wondering though is, if i did win, what the hell would i do with a butler or PA for a day?

I work all day, so have no need for a butler and don't really have a huge house that would warrant a man servant. And honestly it would freak me out a bit having someone there to do all sorts of stuff.... kind of like a freaky shadow or something.

I don't have too many things like bills and stuff for someone else could sort out (since i like it done my own way and only i can really understand it) or too many chores to run or kids to do stuff for or look after.

The chef, i could enjoy but how much notice do you get? And do you have to buy the ingredients or is it a package?

So say i won a butler, do you think i could trade him in for cash? That would be SUPER convenient for me!

Sexercise

I have started getting back into gym again. I really need to since beach season is almost upon us. I am going to Cape Town for a long weekend in a month and we will be spending a lot of time of the beach. Clifton in particular, where all the skinny models go. I do not want to be the beached whale! And i don't want to cause waves of nausea for the person I will be there with (or be very unfavourably compared). But at least I have big boobs, that can be quite distracting! :)

So I've gone back to gym. I am very stiff, but i like it! it feels like I've done something. I was talking to a girl i know at gym and she was commenting on the fact that even though she goes 5 days a week, she doesn't feel like she's getting anywhere. Her weight, fitness and toning has plateaued. I tend to agree, you get to a certain point and short of becoming like a freaky body building chick, that's it!. Though i would love to plateau where she is!

We then started talking about how sex is great exercise and you can notice a difference if you're getting it a lot. It really helps with weight loss and toning! But alas, neither of us are getting it!

So i was thinking.... why don't they offer this service at gym? Apart from the obvious prostitution angle, i think it would be a viable exercise option! Almost like having a personal trainer. They would be very busy and would attract lots of clients, thereby increasing the company profits. There could be sexercise sessions, like tan can sessions. And of course you wouldn't run the risk of getting into a relationship because it is purely business.

I don;t think that single (and this doesn't include those who have friends with benefits) people should have to plateau because they aren't getting laid. We should have ALL kinds of exercise available to us, especially the ones that work the best!

So i say, bring on sexercise as part of the gym contract! And i'm sure they can work out the Vitality rates to go with it! And i promise, i'll work out every day!

Big Weekend!

I (and some girlfriends) have decided boys are morons!! They are totally clueless! Boys are stupid, throw stones at them!

I no longer have a crush. It all got very irritating and quite tiring. I am tried of trying to get things going and always taking the first step. Men are NOT supposed to play hard-to-get!!! What is that? That's for girls to do! (This only reinforces my belief that men are becoming women....) So I have given up. ...sigh.... His loss :)

But i can report that my vow of celibacy is going very well! It's going so well that I have stopped counting the weeks. My brother broke his though, lucky bastard!

My daddy comes home today, from climbing Mount Everest. So i am guessing we will have loads of pics to go through and lots of stories. He has been away for a month. It's the longest he's been away and i think my mom is about to go a bit mad and let the single life go to her head, so thank god he's almost home! and hopefully with some awesome pressies! I will try get my dad to guest blog with the highlights of his giant journey.

Tonight, i am off to the Amstel relaunch party, which should be super fun! I am then OBVIOUSLY watching the rugby tomorrow! I am SO excited!! I remember my first World Cup Final... i was still young and innocent :-)

And that is about it. WOOOHOOOO!!!!

And things keep on going....

At the moment, I am quite content. I am a bit bored at work, but doubt that will keep up for much longer. I should really just make some more work for myself.

It has been raining for the last 2 weeks (or thereabout) and I am really starting to miss the sun! If i wanted this weather, i would be in London! But alas, I know the sun will be back and with a vengeance! Very exciting! Though the rain isn't the worst thing, I was ordered home yesterday afternoon so that I would miss the HUGE storm that was coming. I got stuck in traffic and only got home at the usual time. But it was in time to save my washing from the drizzle. Quite a storm I tell you! It was very disappointing, I was hoping to see (not get in the middle of) a tornado. But again, i have been disappointed.

I seem to also have come out of my self-imposed hibernation. I'm almost fully booked for the rest of the year! Farewells, weekends away at a spa, rugby, birthdays and a trip to Cape Town to end it off. Naturally though that means trying not to overindulge, while losing weight and finding the energy to go to gym. It's not easy, but someone has to do it! Otherwise there is absolutely no way i am going onto Clifton in anything short of a burkha!

What else.... Ooh, i have a crush on someone! Yes, i know i may be too old for that, but it's oh so fun! Of course he probably has no idea (men never do! Why is that??) and i doubt would make a move if he did (men are also very chicken these days.... why is that as well??). I would say that no matter how 'empowered' we become, men should make the first move. So that is my little secret (though i suppose not so secret to those who know me well).

I also went to a psychic... it was awesome! I got a lot of positive stuff out of it, though with the necessary and expected bad news. So if it all comes true, things will be going very well for me! Except for a funeral thrown in.

And that's about it for my little update.

I did try and get my boss to order me home again today on account of the Post Office strike, but he didn't fall for it...